Encountering numerous struggles, every week, is STILL inevitably frustrating. Less so all the time, however, as a result of becoming used to consistent challenges & now FINALLY seeing them lessen. A change in perspective (moving from solely witnessing a loss of abilities to experiencing a reclamation of skills) feels magical & has encouraged me to look for the positive within each hardship.
Wether it’s strengthening my left side, as a result of my right, dominant side, not communicating well with my brain, or forming my own writer’s voice. The possibilities continue to reveal themselves! TIME alongside using my brain routinely, has facilitated my healing and will continue to. I’ve seen authors sharing of their recovery from a TBI and never specifying the severity of their TBI, which silently affirms the reality that their TBIs are mild. Again potential possibilities as a professional writer who incurred a Severe TBI…
After solely having composed content under client’s names, as a result of being a ghost writer, for the proceeding 5 years, I now have a personal story to tell. Very usually, I’m superiorly able (as a result of ALLOT of practice) to find the positivities within my struggles. Often this entails thinking abstractly & counterintuitively – which is also great exercise for my brain!
One such recent example, is when I sprained my left wrist 1 evening, after just a couple days of living in Petaluma. The sprain took place, when I came home 1 evening in the dark and wasn’t yet familiar with my front porch. Admittedly, there was a slight bit of inebriation involved, propelling the misplaced memory…
There are two levels to my front porch & at the time, I forgot this, for the aforementioned reasons. Resultantly, I unlocked my front door from the lowest level & proceeded to walk right in. Inevitably, I tripped over the second (top) step. I nearly fell right on my face! Luckily, I didn’t mar or injure my face, because my left arm flew down instinctively, to hit the floor before my face did. I’ve become so appreciative of my reflexes and instincts, as they compensate, in part, for my present lacking abilities!
My left arm, which has become the arm of mine that instinctually reacts presently, due to my right hand’s disability: its inability to receive, and resultantly act in accordance with, the directions of my brain, in any timely manner. Therefore, my left arm and hand fell down, in front of where my face was set to lad, in protection! Inevitably, my left wrist, when slamming my left hand down quickly, on the concrete ground, took the brunt: my full body wait, largely falling upon my flexed upper arm > wrist…
As a result of impairing my left wrist, my right hand has been forced to reclaim its capabilities. Since right is my naturally dominant hand, yet resulting from my Severe TBI, has become completely inactive -> spastic -> inaccurately able, this sprain is demanding my right regain it’s capabilities. Talk about a forcing function!
This too is righteously frustrating (consciously reverting back to right hand dominance). But now at least I’m forced to (slowly, as has been the case with reclaiming all of my abilities) regain my natural functions.
Comparatively, however, this stage of my healing is productive!
I’m now able to accept just how incredibly fortunate I have been (it’s nearly impossible to be appreciative when everything in life is HARD and unfulfilling). Now, however, I’ve reached the point where I’ve recovered enough, to be very appreciative of 2 aspects: The broad community that supported me when I incurred my TBI, as well as the phenomenal uplifting I’ve received amidst my transition to living with this disability.